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Artist: Unknown
Meditations to Help In Coping With the Death of a Loved One
(Adapted from meditations by James Van Praagh)
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~ Saying Goodbye to Loved Ones and Sending Them on Their Way
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SAYING GOODBYE TO LOVED ONES AND SENDING THEM ON THEIR WAY
You can use this exercise to release your loved one into spirit. Begin by picturing your loved one in your mind's eye. See him as the picture of perfect health standing right in front of you. Any illness, whether cancer, AIDS, Alzheimer's, or another, no longer has any bearing on his new body. Even if his was a quick passing of some kind, or even a traumatic one, just picture the person as complete, happy, and full of life, standing in front of you.
Picture as many details as possible. You may see your loved one in a familiar dress or outfit. If you can, imagine her aroma or scent. Perhaps she had a specific birthmark, or a significant stance, or a particular hairdo. The more detailed you are in your visualization, the more successful the exercise.
Once you have a detailed picture of your loved one in mind, begin a conversation. Ask him about his transition to spirit. Ask: How do you feel now? Tell him how you have been since his death. Tell him about the grief you still feel. Talk to your loved one, and then listen to the answers back to you. Do not stop the exercise even if you think you are merely talking to yourself. It is important to completely follow through without rationalizing any part of it. Enjoy being together once again. Perhaps it will bring back a memory of a time when you were together on the physical earth and the enjoyment in each other's company.
The next step on your journey is to take your loved one's hand and travel together to a beautiful garden that is filled with bright, beautiful, colourful flowers of different shapes and sizes. Smell the fragrance of this incredible garden. Within this wonderful landscaped garden are splendid statues and magnificent fountains where birds frolic and sing their songs. Hear the sounds of children playing and sharing laughter in the distance. Every element around you is perfect. Enjoy the splendour, peace, and tranquility of this special place.
As you look far off into the distance, you see massive buildings. Both of you look toward them. As you get closer, you see the glimmering pillars of pearl of an incredible building. This building shimmers in a light rose colour. All around this building are other buildings spread perfectly apart. Each building differs slightly in design, and each encompasses a sense of heavenly world. You walk inside the massive building together and find yourselves inside a huge living room. In the center of this room is a large movie screen, As you look at the screen, the lights dim and a movie begins. It is a movie of the events and experiences you and your loved one once shared. The picture begins when you first met each other and goes from there. As you watch all the vivid experiences together, feel the emotion that corresponds with the moment. Do this for as long as it takes. Enjoy the times spent together.
When the film is over you feel a sense of relief and completion. You have experienced a piece of time together, but it is not over yet, for there are other experiences to share at another time. You begin to understand that you and your loved one have spent lifetimes together in the past, and you'll spend lifetimes together in the future. Life goes on, whether here on earth or in the Summerland.
Afterwards, you leave the building and travel back to the garden. Among the wonderful, incredible vistas of beautiful flowers and greenery stand several beings dressed in white. Who are they? you ask. Your loved one says: They are my teachers. They are helping me to learn more on this side. You look into their all-knowing eyes and see their compassion. They smile back assuredly, and you know your loved one is where he belongs. He is home, in a place of incredible life and growth. One of the teachers comes over to you and hands you a silver heart on a chain. She tells you to open the heart, and you do. She says, Fill the heart with all the wonderful things you want your loved one to keep with him in his new world. You mind is suddenly full, and all of your thoughts spill into the silver heart: everything you always wanted to tell your loved one, every word you thought but never uttered, every feeling expressed or not; everything you want him to remember. See these thoughts, feelings, and words filling the inside of the silver heart, and as they do, the heart begins to glow. It shines so brightly with your love you can barely look at it. You place the heart around the neck of your loved one so it will be with him always. It is a part of your love and that can never die. You hug your loved one, and he says, I will always be with you.
The time comes when you must return to earth, for just as your loved one must continue to learn and work where he is, you, too, must continue your work where you are. And so it is. You leave this land of spendour with a sense of real life and the knowingness that you will meet again in the garden when you have completed your lessons on earth. At that time, your loved one will greet you and escort you back home.
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Whenever someone passes, the living relatives and friends are often left with a lot of unspoken feelings and regrets. What if, if I could, and if only are the words constantly being wrought over. Those alive feel abandoned and incomplete, as though their hearts are broken and they can no longer continue living life. They would feel much better if they could share their feelings with their loved ones one more time. They don't know how to go on with their burdens and guilt. The following meditation is designed to help let go of such regrets.
Envision yourself standing in front of a cottage in the middle of a beautiful field. The cottage has been created exactly to your liking, including the colour, the wood, and so on. Perhaps there is a porch with a rocking chair. Maybe there is a border of lovely roses on the walkway. See the cottage as yours, for it belongs to no one else but you.
As you enter this house, you immediately see a very comfortable living area with a fluffy, overstuffed sofa full of pillows. To one side is a picture window, and the radiant sunshine filters through it. The wallpaper is made of the finest materials. The room is completely filled with every material item you have ever wanted in your life. Make sure all these items are imbued with you feelings. On the far left wall are several photographs of varying shapes and sizes - pictures of all your family members. You see the faces of those who have passed into the world of spirit and those currently alive. Take down the photo of the individual for whom you are grieving. Bring this framed photograph to the wooden desk in the corner of the room. See this desk exactly as you would have it. This is where you do your special work, the work of the heart. Sit down at your desk and set the picture in front of you. Take out a piece of parchment paper from the desk. Pull out a fountain pen and lay it on the paper.
As you study the photo, ask yourself: What things do I want to be forgiven for? Pick up the pen and start writing your list on the paper. Perhaps you were too judgmental to your loved one, or perhaps you didn't show enough love. Maybe, you felt as though you weren't there when she needed you. Write down any feelings for which you want forgiveness. Next, take another piece of paper and write down all the regrets you have had since your loved one passed into spirit. Write down the words you didn't tell her when she was alive. Maybe you didn't agree on some issues, and they were left unresolved. Maybe you felt as though you could have loved her more. Write down any feeling that you still hold on to and you cannot or are unable to release.
When you are finished the two lists, roll each one up into a scroll. Next, go over to the beautiful window and feel the spring-time breeze that blows through the room. Next to the window, there are two white balloons. Drop each list into a balloon. Blow up the balloon, tie if off, and set it free out of the window. Watch as the two balloons slowly dance their way up to the Summerlands. As they soar high in the sky, you feel a sense of lightness as all the regrets leave your being. As the balloons rise higher and higher, you know that they are bound for your loved one in spirit. See your loved one receive the balloons and read the notes. Take a few moments to look out your window at the sky and see a message from your loved one. The message is: No matter what, I will always love you!
